A not very timely note

This was a blog I once wrote during my high school and early college years. I keep it around for nostalgic purposes, but it is quite obviously no longer updated. I am looking to make a more professional blog presence in the future, but I still like to look at where I was mentally at certain points in time.

- G. Jan 2013

Friday, June 5, 2009

"To Find Ourselves" by G.

There's a tendency to carve out our own little sphere in life. We give ourselves so fully to our own little world, it could be said we enclose ourselves in a self made bubble. But once in awhile we become aware of disturbances in that personal bubble. You see people take vacation days, breaks, a hiatus perhaps; all to try and "find themselves".

Why did they feel lost to begin with? What about themselves did they lose? An Identity? Sounds about right. But is it a matter of finding yourself, or remaking yourself? I don't think we come prepackaged with certain traits like some computer you brought off Ebay. We say that life is about discovering who you are, but I don't think it's some precious gem embedded in your brains someplace. I think the feeling of drifting, without any control over the direction you float; it's not about finding yourself, it's about transforming yourself into what you secretly want and need to be.

The root of all this? Discontent. The feeling that something doesn't fit; that the pieces of the puzzle seem forced together. In the Nature vs. Nuture argument, I guess you would have to plop me on the Nuture side. As we live, we slowly assemble ourselves with the parts we learn and gain from experience. So what are we trying to find? The pieces that fit. It's not about finding who we are, because we want "who we are" to be the ideal form of ourselves, and it probably dosen't exist yet. Want to discover yourself? Keep trying out different pieces to your puzzle; eventually some of them will fit smoothly.

What's your opinion on trying to find yourself? Is the self something innate we can actually find, or something we have to create for ourselves?


Nothing Profound said...

I think you find yourself when you stop looking for yourself. When being or finding or creating yourself is no longer an issue. When you just let yourself be.

(Interesting blog, by the way. Very thought-provoking.)

G. said...

And at that moment a person is finally content. Yeah, a person who can accept and live with who they are in the moment is lucky indeed, but would also be undeniably sacrificing many dreams and ambitions, simply because you have to learn and gain certain traits and experiences to do certain things. But hey, everyone is different; some people want to be big shot doctors/lawyers, some want a nice family and kids and some just want to find peace and meaning in a crazy world. Your option is definitly the one that would bring instant peace of mind to those that don't need inner turmoil on their spiritual journeys.

Well thank you, I try. Appreciate you commenting!

Lucy Lopez said...

I am aware of a 'self' that I connect with when I drop my conditioned ways of thinking, feeling, being, doing. A self that transcends the limits of the physical/material world. A self that is in perfect harmony with all there is, a timeless self.

G. said...

And that's what I wrestle with in my head; do we really have a core self besides the personality that's been conditioned from all our experiences? What you described sounds like achieving Nirvana; a state of everlasting bliss. And it sounds wonderful.

Thanks for dropping in Lucy!

floreta said...

this is absolutely brilliant and you're completely right! thanks for your thoughts.

zorlone said...

Discontent is in the hearts of men... as you have pointed out in your post. I should confess that I also suffer from this illness. Discontent with my phone, work, blog, game, the list goes on. But, there is some form of peace whenever I take a rest and examine what I have. Then I feel fortunate to be able to work, to be able to have a coflone, to manage a blog and to play my favorite game (badminton). There are a lot of people out there who doesn't have the luxury I have, the least in their minds is to search for their selves. At least, I have the time to do that. I am thankful.


G. said...

@Floreta: Thank you for the kind comment!

@Zorlone: Our lives seem to be made of one discontent after another sometimes... but as you said, being thankful for what you DO have and accepting that people will always be discontented sometime goes a long way to having inner peace.

Thank you for your insight as usual Z.